Written by Winston’s Wish
If you’re feeling worried or anxious about forgetting details about your person who has died, you’re not the only one. Or maybe your person died when you were very young and you don’t know certain things about them that you’d like to learn and remember. Forgetting is a very normal worry to have, and we’ve got a suggestion for how you can try to keep your existing memories and even discover new details about your person. We’ve called it ‘Their Life’.
How do I do the ‘Their Life’ activity?
Find an appropriate time and space to think about your person and start this activity. Maybe you got to spend a lot of time with them, or maybe you didn’t, either way you can shape this activity to work for you in a way that suits your unique situation. You might want to ask your family or other people around you to help you.
You could create ‘Their Life’ as a record in your written notes on your phone; recording voice notes; writing on paper; or using a dedicated sketchbook or notepad to create something to keep in your memory box.
Talk to people who knew them if they died when you were very young – people will probably love to share their memories with you and maybe even photos/videos of your person.
What should I include in Their Life activity?
However you decide to create it, you could include details about them such as:
- Their favourite song
- The food they loved to eat
- A piece of clothing they had
- Their favourite film or TV show
- Something you used to do together
- Somewhere you associate them with
- Who they were friends with
- When you first met (if not from birth)
If you don’t know the answers to some of these bullet points, you can skip or change them. They are only suggestions and not essential details! If you want to ask someone you trust to share with you some more information about your person, try to consider their feelings as well and choose an appropriate time and space to speak to them.
If you’d like to contact Winston’s Wish about how to go about recording memories or anything else to do with your grief, you can talk to us, we’re here to listen.
How to speak to Winston’s Wish
If you’re struggling with grief right now, Winston’s Wish is here to help and here to listen. Winston’s Wish provides support for grieving children and young people (up to the age of 25). We offer one-to-one and group support sessions. We also have lots of online resources and a Helpline, email and live chat service where you can talk to bereavement professionals.
You can call us for free on 08088 020 021 (open 8am-8pm, Monday to Friday), email ask@winstonswish.org or use our live chat (open 3-8pm, Monday to Friday) and find out more on our Get Support page.
If you need urgent support in a crisis, you can contact the 24/7 Winston’s Wish Crisis Messenger by texting WW to 85258.
